Saturday, October 26, 2013

GRAVEYARD MUSIC - email jksw



         
A TOURIST IN VIENNA WAS GOING THROUGH A GRAVEYARD  hears music, and there was no one is around, so he starts searching for the source.
He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads "Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770-1827".
Then he realizes that the music is the Ninth Symphony and it is being played backward!
Puzzled, he leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to
return with him. By the time they arrive back at the grave, the music has changed.
This time it is the Seventh Symphony, but like the previous piece, it is being played backward.
Curious, the men agree to consult a music scholar.
When they return with the expert, the Fifth Symphony is playing, backward.
The expert notices that the symphonies are being played in the reverse order in which they were composed, the 9th, then the 7th, then the 5th.
By the next day the word has spread and a crowd has gathered around the grave.
They are all listening to the Second Symphony being played backward. Just then the graveyard's caretaker ambles up to the group.
Someone in the group asks him if he has an explanation for the music.
"I would have thought it was obvious" the caretaker says.
"He's de-Composing."

French police - email from jksw

when the French………





Vraiment très drôle ...! je vous laisse en juger.



 
True story. Guy was stopped and asked to give a breathaliser test.
The guy lives near Le Bugue in the Dordogne and he was as pis*ed as a fart...
The gendarme signals to him to wind down the window, asks him if he has been drinking.

The guy is an Englishman and replies truthfully;

'Yes, this morning I was at my (hic)..daughter's wedding, and as I don't like church much I went to the cafe opposite and had several beers.'


'Then during the wedding banquet I  remember downing three  bottles of wine; (hic)... a corbieres, a Minervois and (hic)...a Faugeres.'
'Then to finish off  the celebrations.... (hic)...me and my mate downed two bottles of Johnny Walker's black label.'
The gendarme warns him; 'Do you understand I'm a policeman and have stopped you for an alcohol test'?

The man replies;
'Do you understand that I'm British,

so is the  car,

and  therefore my wife is sitting in the other seat,

at the steering wheel?'

Friday, October 25, 2013

Sri Lanka's got talent - Dr. Tanya Ekanayaka.

Third Solo Recital at St Martin-in-the-Fields by Pianist-Composer Dr.Tanya Ekanayka on Oct 25th, 2013 « dbsjeyaraj.com 
http://dbsjeyaraj.com/dbsj/archives/26390#more-26390 

The language of money - email jksw

 The dollar today.
jksw

An evening with General Sir John Kotelawala-coup 1962 - email from jksw


We were in our twenties and somewhat socially moving with some minions who
were 'involved' in the 1962 coup.

Yes, post coup, in Dudley's era 1965-1970, hosannas were sung about an
incarcerated Loyola in the Daily Mirror - Reggie Michael. Loyola was even
made out to be a good poet.

The minions on cue giving evidence in 1962 stuck to placing  it all on F.C.
De Saram ( one man said in courts - ' Sir if Colonel F.C De Saram asked me
to shoot my mother, I would do it!")

A few snippet's years later showed  JRJ had nothing to do with it,
 that Dudley said he wanted the military to 'do something'.

In non political life Dudley was a gent.
So, there is a high chance that his statement was a political resonance of a
major outside force in sway at that time.


Lastly in that era without cellphones, telecom was poor and crackly, so the
Galle plotters took over  the  Galle Police station-without any blood shed-a
day earlier than agreed. Ha! Ha! Ha! He he he!

jksw


Subject: FW: An evening with General Sir John Kotelawala




you may find this very interesting true or false no idea


I cannot say how true all this is.  But, I tell you, this is VERY
INTERESTING reading.
The whole article evolves around a fact of history and all identifiable
individuals which
everyone at the time was aware of.
Even though one cannot vouch that this is 100% true, when main
character(Sir.J.K) is considered,
no one should be too surprised if this happens to be a totally genuine
narration.




A memorable evening with General Sir John Kotelawala PC, KBE, CH, K.StJ
Prime Minister of Ceylon 1951-1956
February 2, 2013
by Neville Jayaweera


It was on a hot summer's evening in June 1974, on the manicured lawn of Sir
John's sprawling farm Brogues Wood in Kent, that the extraordinary
conversation I am about to narrate took place.

I happened to be travelling in England at that time, when Mrs. Lorna Wright,
Sir John's housekeeper and hostess at that time, telephoned me to say that
Sir John will be happy if I would come round one evening to Brogues Wood for
drinks and supper. Needless to say, I accepted the invitation promptly!

Sir John received me under the porch of his sprawling manor in his
characteristic expansive style, adding with a loud guffaw, "So! So!
Jayaweera, what foul wind blows you to this fair shore, men?" and waved me
to one of a circle of chairs that had been arranged for drinks on the lawn
and invited me to share his favourite premier malt whiskey Glenfiddich,
before sitting down to supper.

Except for some of the unprintable expletives with which Sir John laced the
conversation, here below is the full-unabridged version.

Historiography is like an iceberg, only 1/7th being visible above the water.
Unseen and unheard, but bulging large below the water line, there is
invariably a tangled mass of cunning machinations, pretences and deceptions
which, though never entering the mainstream of official history, are often
its driving motors and mainsprings.

To preserve their richness and flavour I shall relate Sir John's narrations
in the first person dramatic form, rather than in a third person reportage
format, which would drain the stories of their vibrancy, but I shall have to
exclude from the narrative some of Sir John's rich expletives which even for
a Sunday reader might be a bit over the top.

Sir John ( Sir.J.): So! So! I understand you have taken early retirement.
Damn shame! No wonder! Who the hell can work with this bunch! (meaning Mrs.
B's United Front coalition government of 1970 which included the LSSP and
the Communist party )
Neville J ( N.J. ): Well Sir! I had only just turned 40 and I thought I
should launch out on a new career and took early retirement.

Sir. J. You know something? I'll tell it to you now and if you wish to you
can quote me. Sri Lanka is not ready for democracy. In a country like Sri
Lanka democracy becomes government by bloody mugs and idiots. You take a
villager, wash the mud off him, clothe him in a national dress and he is
ready to govern the country. Look at the present lot (i.e. the 1970 UF
government).They got in by promising to give our poor buggers (sic) two
measures of free rice, even from the moon. The rulers as well as the people
who voted them to power are total idiots.

N.J. Hang on a moment Sir John. Mrs B's present government ( UF government
of 1970 - 77 ) has on its Cabinet people like Dr N. M, Perera, Dr Colvin R.
de Silva, Pieter Keuneman, and several other professionals who are hardly
illiterate gamaralas whose mud has just been washed out! Also please don't
forget Sir, that it was Dudley who first gave one measure of free rice and
Mrs B went only one better. Dudley also started the Poya Day holidays. Don't
you agree that both policies were utterly idiotic? Dudley and you come from
the same upper class. So it is not always the gamarala who comes to town who
is an idiot but upper-class gentlemen who have been to St. Thomas' and
Cambridge are no better.

Sir. J. You are damn right!. But why did Dudley give the people a measure of
free rice and Poya Day holidays because that was the only way to placate our
bloody illiterate voters. You give our buggers (sic) a plate of buriyani and
you have them by their "b - - - s". It will always be like that in this
country. Look at the great Thomian and Oxford intellectual the great SWRD,
"Sinhala Only in 24 hours". Why? That was the only way to beat me. He got
elected and he put the country on reverse gear. I stood for two official
languages and I got booted out!

N.J. Incidentally Sir John, you mentioned that Dudley and you were both
involved in coup attempt and also that you both were to be in the proposed
junta. That is completely new to me! Tell me more.

Sir. J. - "I say! I know you think that Dudley was a man of great integrity.
You know, there is no such thing as integrity in politics. That is all
balderdash! We all wear masks and our so called masters, the voters, who
vote us to power are bloody stupid. They are bloody idiots! So you see,
democracy is how effectively we can dupe the voters with our aes baendun
(masks). True, neither Dudley, nor anyone of our time would ever think of
taking bribes but that was because we did not need any money. Not because we
were any better than the other buggers (sic). But when it concerns power we
politicians lie all the way to hell, are all bloody corrupt and will do
anything to gain power and keep power, and it is only the fear of getting
caught that makes us honest gentlemen!

Sir John continues. You know something? All that SWRD'S Cabinet Minister of
Posts did was personally to appoint all sub-post mistresses. He personally
interviewed all applicants for posts of sub-post mistresses throughout the
country in his bedroom in the Mawanella Rest House, and gave them
"efficiency bar" tests before appointing them. How do you like that!!

N.J. Well Sir! To be truthful we have heard similar stories about you and
your several " purple brigades of Colombo 7". How about Zou Zou Mohammed and
the belly dancers you got down from Egypt ? The problem I have with your
story is that what seems acceptable in Kandawela seems very bad in
Mawanella!

Sir. J. Ha! Ha! Ha! You are a cheeky bugger (sic). I like you! Suddenly,
Sir. J stands up pours me another drink and switches topics - I say
Jayaweera! Have you read the "Premier Stakes"?

N.J. Yes Sir, I have "

(note : the "Premier Stakes" was a vitriolic political pamphlet published
anonymously in 1951, shortly after D.S. Senanayake's death, recounting the
sordid machinations that led to Sir John's eviction from the race to succeed
D.S. as Prime Minister, and the installing of Dudley as Prime Minister
instead. Although written anonymously, it was widely known that the real
author was Sir John himself, who had asked Sri Lankan journalist J.
Vijayatunge to ghost write the pamphlet for him)

SJ. Well then! Let me tell you something you do not know about Dudley. "Will
you believe me when I say that Dudley and I were both ring leaders of the
attempted coup of 1962?"

N.J . "I have heard the story about Dudley's alleged involvement in the coup
before, but I do not think there was a grain of truth in it! As for your
involvement in the coup this the first time I am hearing it, and you must be
very brave to talk about it even 15 years later. "

S. J. "Here are the names of the buggers (sic) who met in my house on
consecutive evenings in early January 1962 at Kandawela to plan the coup. It
was all hatched by that bloody (sic) colleague of yours, Douggy Liyanage,
along with F.C de Saram, Maurice de Mel, Jungle Dissanayake and a few other
police chaps and both Dudley, his cousin Upali Senanayake, and I, went along
with them and all along we were in their confidence and gave them support.
They shared all their plans with us three! In fact even Thattaya (i.e. Sir
Oliver Goonatilleke the Governor General) was in the know!

Dudley's initial role was to stand under the large clock of the General Post
Office opposite Queen's House, on the night of the coup, and light his pipe
and Thattaya ( (meaning Sir Oliver ) who was scheduled to stand watch on the
balcony around midnight, would take that as the cue that the coup was on and
declare a state of emergency and order the arrest of Mrs B, Felix Dias
Bandaranaike and Dr N.M Perera and the rest. After that we were to form a
Council to run the government and both Dudley and I were in it, with Dudley
as chairman.

However, let me tell you something, there was not going to be any shooting.
No one was to be killed. We were in fact going to treat Mrs. B and the men
who were arrested very nicely and supply them with all their meals from
Galle Face Hotel, no less!

N.J. So, why didn't all this come out in the course of the police
investigations or at the trial? Surely!!

S.J. That is the beauty of it men!! F.C de Saram took all the blame upon
himself as the principal conspirator and all the others who were sworn to
secrecy, just kept their mouths shut about the involvement of Thattaya,
Dudley, Upali and myself!! All the coup leaders were guilty as hell, but
they were all splendid gentlemen! You know, unlike now, (i.e. in 1974) those
days there were only gentlemen at the top and no bastards!!

Sir John then went on to tell me how one evening in the last week of Jan
1962, (the coup had been planned for 28th Jan) he, F.C de Saram, Dudley and
Maurice de Mel sat together for drinks at his Kandawela residence to plot
the final details for the coup. They had placed Upali Senanayake ( Dudley's
cousin) in a jeep at the entrance to Kandawala to sound the alarm by
pressing the horn of the jeep should any police vehicles be seen approaching
the gate. At this point, to make the narrative come alive, I think I'll
switch back to the first person dramatic mode.

Sir. J. You see, all of sudden the horn of Upali's jeep started sounding
loud, and went on sounding and what was worse, the jeep started approaching
the house at speed, with the horn blasting away! We thought that the police
were about to stage a raid and Upali was warning us. All hell broke loose
inside my dining room where we were gathered. We all panicked! F.C de Saram
ran upstairs and hid in a dirty linen room and. Maurice de Mel hid in the
broom cupboard under the stair case. But that fatso ( sic) Dudley could not
make up his mind where to run, (side comment from Sir. J "just like him!
cannot make up his bloody mind in a dam crisis" ). So I shouted to him, "
Yakko! reddha yata ringapung!" (You bloody fool! hide under the table
cloth!) So, Dudley crept under the dining table and hid behind the draped
table cloth. Can you imagine anything more bloody funny? Already twice Prime
Minister of the country and to be Prime Minister yet again some years later,
hiding under a dining table, with his fat arse ( sic) showing through the
table cloth? If only the bloody electorates know how damn ridiculous we
politicians really are!

 Sir. J. But there was no police raid or anything like that! It was just
that Upali had been meddling with the steering wheel of the jeep and the
horn suddenly short circuited and got stuck. So he drove back to the house,
the horn blasting away, to tell us what had happened. Bloody idiot! (sic)
That is a bloody Senanayake for you.

N.J. So, do you mean to say that the investigators could not break through
FC de Saram and company and unearth yours and Dudley's involvement?

Sir. J. Exactly! Nothing the police did could get FC de Saram and company to
confess and spill the beans about Dudley and me. They stuck to their story
that they and they alone were responsible. Which of course put a huge burden
of guilt upon us and we had to do everything possible to get these poor
buggers (sic) out. After all, we were all with them in the conspiracy and we
could not allow them alone to take the rap. So we had to plan a cunning plot
to get them out and implementing that plan was my job.