email from 'Karals', Merry Christmas

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Lakshman Karalliedde	8:50 PM (10 hours ago)

Have a merry Christmas

Dear Staff,

Please be advised that all employees planning to dash through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are required to undergo a risk Assessment addressing the safety of open sleighs for members of the public. This assessment must also consider whether it is appropriate to use only one horse for such a venture, particularly where there are multiple passengers. Please note that permission must also be obtained in writing from landowners before their fields may be entered. To avoid offending those not participating in celebrations, we request that laughter is moderate only and not loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.

Benches, stools and orthopedic chairs are now available for collection by any shepherds planning or required to watch their flocks at night. While provision has also been made for remote monitoring of flocks by CCTV cameras from a centrally heated shepherd observation hut, all facility users are reminded that an emergency response plan must be submitted to account for known risks to the flocks. The angel of the Lord is additionally reminded that — prior to shining his/her glory all around — s/he must confirm that all shepherds are wearing appropriate Personal Protective Equipment to account for the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and the overwhelming effects of Glory.

Following last year’s well publicized case, everyone is advised that EEOC legislation prohibits any comment with regard to the redness of any part of Mr. R. Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr. R Reindeer from reindeer games will be considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found guilty of this offense.

While it is acknowledged that gift-bearing is commonly practiced in various parts of the world, particularly the Orient, everyone is reminded that the bearing of gifts is subject to Hospitality Guidelines and all gifts must be registered. This applies regardless of the individual, even royal personages. It is particularly noted that direct gifts of currency or gold are specifically precluded under provisions of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act.  Further, caution is advised regarding other common gifts, such as aromatic resins that may evoke allergic reactions.

Finally, in the recent case of the infant found tucked up in a manger without any crib for a bed, Social Services have been advised and will be arriving shortly.

Merry Christmas,

Risk Management Department

email from 'Kalu Nana', another get-together of 1960 entrants Batch.

Calling all our Batch Mates (1960 Colombo medical Entrants)

Dear all

1960 Colombo medical entrants ( 1960 batch)- Special appeal to all

Can we at the outset wish all our batch mates a very merry Christmas and a very happy and a prosperous New Year 2013.

Those who are still alert and reasonably active and have access to internet, must be enjoying  the regular updates and  variety of  ‘anecdotes’ sent out by our energetic   web master  Philip. It is also likely that some of the batch mates tend to ‘meet and greet’ in small groups at different locations.

Our last formal Batch Get Together held in July 2010 at Habarana was  very successful and appreciated by all the attendees. Not everyone joined but a majority did and the general consensus was- ‘wonderful  Occasion’ indeed. 3 cheers once again to our ‘Organisers’.

We have  so far managed to meet every 5 years  but with our rapid decline in our  mental and physical faculties with our advancing years( if only it fits), why not consider an earlier ‘Batch get Together’ say in December 2013?

We have been very fortunate to have the expertise of our ‘permanent Organising committee’ led by Kapu.   Habarana had been a wonderful location too. But the access from Colombo had not been that easy for a majority.

Can we make this humble appeal to the organising Committee to seriously consider planning ahead for the next ‘Batch Get Together’ once again earlier than the 5 year cycle.

Can we also suggest an out side location closer to Colombo ( say within 40-50 mile radius) to minimise long distance travel.

As usual, ex patriots’ domiciled  overseas would offer their support in what ever means (within reason).

If no one responds to this we can presume that  you have completely rejected this daft  appeal.

Best wishes

Kalu Nana

C.S.Nanayakkara

( some of the jokers who shared this view are: M.G.S. Karu, L.R. Amarasekera, Vipula Ariyasinghe, Philip Veerasingham, M.B.S ( Siri) De Silva, Kasturi)