Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Irish joke

Long live the Irish so that we all can enjoy the best jokes.
JKS Weerasekera
Sean is the vicar of a Protestant parish in Southern Ireland, and Patrick 
is the priest at the Roman Catholic Church across the road.

One day they are seen together, erecting a sign which says:

"THE END IS NEAR. TURN YOURSELF AROUND NOW BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE."

As a car speeds past them, the driver leans out his window and yells,
 
"Leave people alone, you religious nutters. We don't need your lectures."

From around the next curve they hear screeching tires and a big splash.

Shaking his head, Father Patrick says "Dat's da terd one dis mornin'."

"Yaa," Sean agrees, then adds, "Do ya tink maybe da sign should just say

"BRIDGE CLOSED”?



Present given to a new-born by the infants mother

Our zeroeth birthday present

We inherit our microbiomes from our mother, picking up billions of them as we slide from her largely bacteria-free womb through her microbe-laden vagina. Being slathered in vaginal microbes might not seem like much of a treat but it’s vital for a newborn.
Babies end up with a very different portfolio of skin and gut bacteria depending on how they are delivered. Those who are born naturally harbor a more diverse array of bacteria, which resemble those in their mother’s vagina, including several species that are important for digestion. Those who are delivered by C-section are colonised by a less diverse array of bacteria, including some like Staphylococcus that are picked up from the hospital environment.
These early differences could directly affect a baby’s health for these first colonisers determine which the species that will follow. The bacterial heirlooms that babies inherit from their mothers might act as a shield, preventing more dangerous microbes like from setting up shop. By changing baby’s first bacteria, C-sections could alter the make-up of their later communities, leading to long-term effects on health and nutrition.



New model Volkswagen

  Email from Kamalini Kanapathippillai

Volkswagen have been working furiously to rectify their emissions problem. 
This new model should be in the dealers soon.

PS
This would not pass the exhaust emission certificate because of the emissions from the horse, but Volkswagen is working on it.

What is a breast