Ceylon 1932

You will relish it again. 9 minutes. Plenty of reminiscences  for me

jksw

 

Tropical ceylon 1932 as the British saw it

http://www.youtube.com/embed/vIlI5fhZsxQ?rel=0

Udurawana jokes

email from jksweerasekara

Udurawana was looking at an Egyptian mummy with one of his friends.
Udurawana : Look so many bandages, 
I'm sure it is a lorry accident case....

Friend : Aaho!, Lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!....

****************************************************************************

Udurawana at a bar in New York. Man on his right says "Johny Walker single" Man on his left says "Peter Scotch single" Udurawana says -  "Ranjit Udurawana Married" ******* Boss : I am giving u a job as a driver.  STARTING salary Rs.2000/-, is it o.k ?? Udurawana : U R great sir! Starting salary is ok.......buttt?? how much is the DRIVING salary...? ******* Udurawana's theory on Sun and Moon :  Moon is more important than Sun,  coz it gives light at night when light is needed, but Sun gives light during the day  when light is not needed !!! ******* Udurawana shouting 2 his girl friend  " u said v will register our marriage and you cheated me,  I was waiting 4 u yesterday the whole day in the post office but you never came .... *******   Udurawana in an interview 4 a post of detective. Interviewer : who killed SWRD? (an ex- PM of Sri Lanka) Udurawana : Thank u 4 giving me the job Sir,  I will immediately start investigating.......   *******

Marvel at the Universe! Can you just imagine!

email from Nihal Gooneratne

2_MarvelattheUniverse.pps

Retirement - email from Kamalini Kanapathippillai.

Have a good chuckle  . . . . especially those of you who think they will never have to retire, ever!!

 

 

----- 

Why I Like Retirement ! Question: How many days in a week?  Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?  Answer: Two hours after he falls asleep on the couch. Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?  Answer: Only one, but it might take all day. Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?  Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done. Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?  Answer: The term comes with a 10% discount. Question: Among retirees, what is considered formal attire?  Answer: Tied shoes. Question: Why do retirees count pennies?  Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.  Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?  Answer: NUTS!  Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?  Ans wer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.  Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?  Answer: Normal . Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?  Answer: The never ending Coffee Break. Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?  Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents. Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?  Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth. And, my very favorite....  QUESTION: What do you do all week?  Answer: Monday through Friday, NOTHING..... Saturday &Sunday, I rest. SERENITY Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, 'How old was your husband?' '98,' she replied....  'Two years older than me' 'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.. She responded, 'Hardly worth going home, is it? Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman:  'And what do you think is the best thing  about being 104?' the reporter asked... She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.' The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs and have fun finding them. I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,  new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes.  I'm half blind,  can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,  take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license. I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,  so I got my doctor's permission to  join a fitness club and start exercising.  I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.  I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on,  the class was over.   My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.  Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Know how to prevent sagging?  Just eat till the wrinkles fill out. It's scary when you start making the same noises  as your coffee maker. These days about half the stuff  in my shopping cart says,  'For fast relief.' THE SENILITY PRAYER :  Grant me the senility to forget the people  I never liked anyway,  the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and  the eyesight to tell the difference. Now, I think you're supposed to share this with 5 or 6, maybe 10 others. Oh heck, give it to a bunch of your friends if you can remember who they are!  Always Remember This:  You don't stop laughing because you grow old,  You grow old because you stop laughing!

Nidahas baila

email from Susiri Weeraseara

Nanda Malani and Sunil Ariyaratne--Nidahas Baila

Did you listen to Nanda Malani. The Lyrics by Prof.Sunil Ariyaratne  phenomenally fabulous!  
Click on link below:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RoJEkTMxBvI

Listen also to:-

http://youtu.be/X12t-OJxabw

Mathematical Puzzle

email from Sunil Liyanage	22 Jan (7 days ago)

This works!!

Your Phone number will reveal your Age.
I do not know who discovered this? Really accurate.

It will take about 15 seconds, read and do it at the same time so that you
will not lose the fun.

[1] Take a look at your last digit of your cell phone number
[2] Use this figure and multiply by 2
[3] Then add 5
[4] And then multiply by 50
[5] And then add the number 1763
[6] The last step; with this number, subtract your birth year.
Now you see a three-digit number.
The first digit is the last digit of your phone number, the next digits is
your actual age!
Surprising?

This is a very interesting maths problem, really accurate.
Very magical, feel free to share with everyone.
Do not believe?  Try it... I did & it worked !

Didn’t know I was THAT old!

Clapping Obama Way - email from Lawrence Ratnam

Barack Obama, at a recent rural elementary school assembly in South Carolina, asked the audience for total quiet. Then, in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands once every few seconds, holding the audience in total silence. Then he said into the microphone, 'Children, every time I clap my hands together, a child in America dies from gun violence.' Then, little Darrell, with a proud South Carolina drawl, pierced the quiet and said, "Well, dumb ass, stop clapping!