Sayings - email from Dawood

[1]

Regular naps prevent old age,

especially if you take them while driving.

[2]

Having one child makes you a parent;

having two makes you  a referee.

[3]

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right;

and the other is the husband!

[4]

I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile.

I tried - but they wanted cash.

[5]

Marriage is give and take. 

You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

[6]

My wife and I always compromise.

I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.

[7]

It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job,

he still ends up with the same boss.

[8]

Saving is the best thing.

Especially when your parents have done it for you.

[9]

Wise men talk because they have something to say;

fools talk because they feel they have to say something.

[10]

They call our language the mother tongue because the 

father seldom 

gets to speak!

[11]

Man : Is there any way for long life ?

Dr. : Get married.

Man : Will it help 

Dr : No , but then the thought of long life will never occur.

[12]

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding ?

It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands  

before the fight begins !

[13]

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do ?

 Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

[14]

It's funny when people discuss: Love Marriage vs Arranged marriage.

It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

[15]

There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.

email from Dawood

This is the Captain speaking

email from Dawood

Dawood	08:36 (13 hours ago)
to me

Subject: Wedding !!!!!

.... when you got to go, .... you got to go

The picture of the week !!!!

Message from Dawood

To my friends  who enjoy a glass of wine... And those who don't and are always  seen with a bottle of water in their hand. As Ben Franklin said: In wine  there is wisdom, In beer there is freedom, In water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, Scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 litre of water each day, At the end  of the year we would have absorbed More than 1  kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria Found in  feces. In other  words, we are consuming 1 kilo of  poo.. However, We do NOT  run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or  tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) Because  alcohol has to go through a purification process Of boiling,  filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poo Wine =  Health Therefore,  it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, Than to drink water and be  full of shit. There  is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing  it as a public  service!

email from Dawood

Hi Phillip,

you may enjoy the following!

Rgds
Dawood

Prayer for Senility:

God grant me the senility
to forget the people I never liked anyway,
the good fortune to run into the ones I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference.

I'm Fine, How are You?

There's nothing the matter with me,
I'm just as healthy as can be,
I have arthritis in both knees,
And when I talk, I talk with a wheeze.
My pulse is weak, my blood is thin,
But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.

All my teeth have had to come out,
And my diet I hate to think about.
I'm overweight and I can't get thin,
But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.

Arch supports I need for my feet.
Or I wouldn't be able to go out in the street.
Sleep is denied me night after night,
But every morning I find I'm all right.
My memory's failing, my head's in a spin.
But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.

The moral of this as the tale unfolds,
Is that for you and me, who are growing old.
It is better to say "I'm fine" with a grin,
Than to let people know the shape we are in.

I'm fine, how are you ?

e mail from Dawood

Dear Phillip,
A pic of Rani Wijesurendra is attached.
Taken at the recent Meetup.
Her frailty and gentleness are portrayed.
Thanks
Dawood