Humor of married life.

A MARRIED MAN'S PRAYER;
DEAR GOD, U GAVE ME CHILDHOOD, U TOOK IT AWAY.
U GAVE ME YOUTH, U TOOK IT AWAY.
U GAVE ME A WIFE.......... IT’S BEEN YEARS NOW,
JUST REMINDING U......

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WIFE: SHALL I PREPARE SOUP OR DHAL TODAY .
HUSBAND: FIRST MAKE IT, WE WILL NAME IT LATER

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A FRUSTRATED HUSBAND IN FRONT OF HIS LAPTOP:
DEAR GOOGLE, PLEASE DO NOT BEHAVE LIKE MY WIFE...
PLEASE ALLOW ME TO COMPLETE MY SENTENCE BEFORE YOU START GUESSING

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HUSBAND: I FOUND ALADIN'S LAMP TODAY.
WIFE: WOW, WHAT DID U ASK FOR DARLING??
HUSBAND: I ASKED HIM TO INCREASE YOUR BRAIN TEN TIMES..
WIFE: OH..JAAN..LUV U SO MUCH.. DID HE DO THAT??
HUSBAND: HE LAUGHED AND SAID MULTIPLICATION DOESN'T APPLY ON ZERO.

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A MAN GIFTED HIS WIFE A DIAMOND NECKLACE FOR THEIR ANNIVERSARY AND 
WIFE DIDN'T SPEAK TO HIM FOR 6 MONTHS.
WAS THE NECKLACE FAKE?
NOOOOO! THAT WAS THE DEAL :)

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A COUPLE WAS HAVING DINNER AT A FANCY RESTAURANT. AS THE FOOD WAS 
SERVED, THE HUSBAND SAID, "THE FOOD LOOKS DELICIOUS, LET'S EAT."
WIFE: HONEY.....YOU SAY PRAYER BEFORE EATING AT HOME.
HUSBAND: THAT'S AT HOME SWEETHEART......HERE THE CHEF KNOWS HOW TO 
COOK.

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BEST SLOGAN ON A MAN'S T-SHIRT :
"PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB ME,
I AM MARRIED AND ALREADY VERY DISTURBED"