Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Transcripts from court - email from Kamalini Kanapathippillai


ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
  WITNESS:   He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
  ATTORNEY: And
 why did that upset you?
  WITNESS:   My name is Susan!
  ____________________________________________
  

  ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
  WITNESS:   Yes.
  ATTORNEY:  And in what ways does it affect your memory?
  WITNESS:    I forget.
  ATTORNEY:  You forget?  Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
  ___________________________________________
  
  
  ATTORNEY:  Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep , he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
  WITNESS:  Did you actually pass the bar exam?
  ____________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  The youngest son, the 20-year-old , how old is he?
  WITNESS:    He's 20, much like your IQ.
  ___________________________________________
  
   _________________________________________
   (My Favourite)
  ATTORNEY:  So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
  WITNESS:    Yes.
  ATTORNEY:  And what were you doing at that time?
  WITNESS:    Getting laid
  ____________________________________________
   (Another favourite)
  ATTORNEY:  She had three children , right?
  WITNESS:    Yes.
  ATTORNEY:  How many were boys?
  WITNESS:
    None.
  ATTORNEY:   Were there any girls?
  WITNESS:     Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
  ____________________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  How was your first marriage terminated?
  WITNESS:    By death.
  ATTORNEY:  And by whose death was it terminated?
  WITNESS:    Take a guess.
  ____________________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  
 Can you describe the individual?
  WITNESS:     He was about medium height and had a beard
  ATTORNEY:  
 Was this a male or a female?
  WITNESS:     Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
  _____________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
  WITNESS:  No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
  ______________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
  WITNESS:    All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
  _________________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
  WITNESS:    Oral.
  _________________________________________
 
  ATTORNEY:  Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
  WITNESS:    The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
  ATTORNEY:  And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
  WITNESS:    If not, he was by the time I finished.
  ____________________________________________
 
   
  And last:
 
  ATTORNEY:  Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
  WITNESS:     No.
  ATTORNEY:  Did you check for blood pressure?
  WITNESS:     No.
  ATTORNEY:  Did you check for breathing?
  WITNESS:     No.
  ATTORNEY:  So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
  WITNESS:     No.
  ATTORNEY:  How can you be so sure, Doctor?
  WITNESS:     Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
  ATTORNEY:  I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
  WITNESS:     Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

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