Friday, July 12, 2013

Aphorisms - email from Sunil Liyanage

APHORISM: A SHORT, POINTED SENTENCE THAT EXPRESSES
A WISE OR CLEVER OBSERVATION OR A GENERAL TRUTH

1. The nicest thing about the future is . . .
that it always starts tomorrow.

2. Money will buy a fine dog .. . .
but only kindness will make him wag his tail.

3. If you don't have a sense of humour . . .
you probably don't have any sense at all.

4. Seat belts are not as confining . . .
as wheelchairs.

5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is . . .
when you're in deep water.

6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of
the dark . .
to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?

7. Business conventions are important . . .
because they demonstrate how many people a company can
operate without.

8. Why is it that at class reunions . . .
you feel younger than everyone else looks?

9. Stroke a cat (or dog) . . ..
and you will have a permanent job.

10. No one has more driving ambition than the teenage boy
  (or girl) . . ..
who wants to buy a car.

11. There are no new sins . . ..
the old ones just get more publicity.

12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong
number at 4 a.m. . ..
like, it could be the right number.

13. No one ever says "It's only a game" . . .
when their team is winning.

14. I've reached the age where . . .
'happy hour' is a nap.

15. Be careful about reading the fine print . . .
there's no way you're going to like it.

16. The trouble with bucket seats is that . . .
not everybody has the same size bucket.

17. Do you realise that, in about 40 years . . .
we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?
(And rap music will be the Golden Oldies!)

18. Money can't buy happiness .. . .
but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Cadillac than
in a Mini.

19. After 60, if you don't wake up aching in every joint .
you're probably dead.

20. Always be yourself because the people that matter don't mind . . ..
and the ones that mind don't matter.

21. Life isn't tied with a bow .. . .
but it's still a gift.

REMEMBER....
POLITICIANS AND NAPPIES
SHOULD
BE CHANGED OFTEN AND FOR THE
SAME REASON"
 

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